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Behind the Music: Shivaji

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bollywood

Title of this doesn’t make sense to you? No worries, neither will that video from a movie called Shivaji. It’s 5 minutes of some of the most insane shit ever committed to video that includes a choreographed dance number and India’s answer to Tom Savini macking on some honey while killing Cirque du Soleil. Let’s break it down so you can figure it out.

 

0:04 – It’s like the gay cousin of that street from Indiana Jones
0:07 – Our mistake, it’s like Kung Fu Hustle. But still queer.
0:17 – The Birdman is very attracted to that poor girl from the 80’s
0:26 – If you haven’t said “what the f*ck” yet, start now.
0:40 – wire work, a motorcycle Desperado, Michael Jackson and an out of shape man all in the same place at the same time? Bollywood is the impossible dream!
0:45 – He sticks the landing and gets a guitar gang!
1:02 – This would win America’s Got Talent in a heartbeat
2:00 – Absolute best shot in the entire video
2:01 – Oh shit, dawg! Fake arms!
2:30 – This guy dances worse than old people f*cking.
2:37 – What’s the death toll in this video now?
3:25 – In case you weren’t sure, this begins a sequence wherein the janitor who stars in this video not only dodges a bullet, but throws a gun boomerang style so it can catch someone and shoot them. That is the best thing ever. Except for 2:00.
4:17 – That’s a guitar wagon on the right side of the screen. Relevant? No.
4:42 – Oh shit, now that’s the best scene in the video.
4:48 – The answer is yes, he just used the power of his mind to stop a high caliber round from piercing his skull, and then to add insult to injury, he drowned that thing in blue curacao.
5:07 – They stole your guitar! What movie can you rip off to save yourself?
5:15 – Desperado! Again!

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